At the gates of hell

I have had health related problems lately it's probably nothing but it can also claim my life.
I have always recognized the reality of death it's certain that someday I will surely die the seconds I have can be millions or just a few.

It's funny that even at the risk of losing it all we cling to our path of diminishing returns. I ask what do we have to experience to change nature of ourselves?
Do I have to experience suffering and excruciating pain to learn my lesson and find enlightenment, power and humility?
Maybe it's that we are so prideful and stubborn that only at the gates of hell we will learn our lesson - life is too short to give in to fear.